(The great meeting)
(Scene opens in darkness. Spinning newspaper flies up and fills the screen. The headline reads, "Queen Aeka gone insane!?" The story reads "In her mad attempts to retrieve her kidnapped husband, Tenchi Masaki, and stop the evil dæmon Reyoko, supreme ruler Aeka has called a meeting of the universe's greatest forces. Attending this meeting will be: The Ronin warriors, the Z fighters, all of the Marvel and DC comic nebula, choice members of the Capcom constellation, most of the Square Soft and Nintendo star systems, the Sega confederation, the Sailor Scouts, the Thunder Cats, the FBI, all other capable armies and nations in the universe, and any civilian who feels like it. More or less, everyone in existence is expected to attend. Queen Aeka is offering a supreme reward to whoever claims the bounty. Will the competition between these forces result in the complete and total obliteration of the universe? 20th century FOX says,…it will." Heero, Ryo, and Trowa appear in an enormous conference room, filled with all of the people listed in the newspaper article)
Aeka: Greetings, all! I have invited you here because you are the most powerful forces in the universe...or some pathetic nobody who wants my reward. Your mission, for the illiterate and isolated among you that still don’t know, is to destroy the villain Reyoko and rescue my husband Tenchi. Two separate rewards will be given. One to the person who kills Reyoko, another to whomever retrieves Tenchi. Please remember that Tenchi must be alive to receive any form of payment.
Wolverine: GET TO THE REWARD!!!
Sonic: This better be worth it!!!
(Crowd gets into a raucous)
Aeka: Very well! I shall show you the rewards right now. To the one who destroys Reyoko, I shall bestow this charming little Galactic Leyline in a box!
Ryu (from Street Fighter): …what the hell is that?!
Jean Starwind: It grants wishes!
Mario: Then'a why doesn't she use it to destroy'a Reyoko?!
Dr. J's voice coming from everywhere at once: Well what fun would that be?!
(Everyone stops and looks around the room for where that came from)
Heero: (waving his gun over the crowd) Where is he?! Where's Dr. J?!
Crowd: (confused murmurs).
Heero: ...never mind. Just...continue.
Aeka: …You will also receive unlimited credit throughout the universe, along with your own planet, completely filled with wine.
Frieza: What's the vintage?
Aeka: Each bottle is aged to its own specific perfection!
(Half the room drools)
Aeka: For those of you who don't drink, you will instead receive your own galaxy to rule as you see fit! For the one who rescues Tenchi, you will receive this enchanted bag, from which you can pull anything in the universe!
Captain Commando: You expect us to buy that load of bull?!
(Washuu walks onto the stage)
Washuu: It's actually quite simple, really. The bag simply resynthesizes all the matter within to whatever you picture in your mind. Such as this atom bomb!
(Washuu reaches in bag and pulls out atom bomb)
Nights: Can I try?
Aeka: No. Now get going! I suggest that you all try working together, for she truly is the most powerful being in the universe.
Vegeta: To hell with that! That reward is mine!!!
(Everyone except for Heero, Ryo, Trowa, and the other Ronins, but including Aeka, blow through the wall and head for Reyoko)
Kento: Hey Ryo, ain't 'cha comin?
Ryo: No, sorry guys, but I've got stuff to do.
Sage: What do ya mean?! You're a Ronin! What else do you have to do?!
Ryo: Well, you see, this isn't real, and neither are you. So good-bye.
Rowen: ...uh...I feel real.
Ryo: Well you're not. Good-bye.
Sai: But we need your white armor!
Ryo: Hey! You guys didn't help me when Mia and I broke up! I'm not helping you get some stupid reward!
Other Ronins: …what?
Ryo: GET LOST!!!
(Ryo walks over to Heero and Trowa. Other Ronins leave, very confused)
Heero: Well, I guess we can start looking now.
Trowa: He'll probably be in this room somewhere. We did just hear him, and I don't think he'd be fighting Reyoko. It's too dangerous, even for Dr. J.
Heero: A hint would help, Dr. J!
Dr. J's voice: Very well. I was just under your chair during the meeting, but now I'm not!
Heero: ...that’s not a hint.
Dr. J: Oh, very well. I've sided with Reyoko!
Heero: ...DAMN YOU DR. J!!!!!!
Trowa: Well, we'd better get to the spaceport before every ship is stolen.
(They go to the spaceport and find a shuttle with their Gundams docked there)
Heero: Convenient. What'll you fight in Ryo?
Ryo: Don't worry. With my armor on, I can breath in space.
Heero: But can you move?
Ryo: I won't need to fight. We just have to find Dr. J.
Heero: But we'll have to get through Reyoko to get to him.
Ryo: I could just use my Flare-up Now from on top of the ship.
Heero: Fine. Let's just hurry before the universe collapses again.
(They get in the shuttle and follow the other ships to Reyoko. Two hours later, they arrive at the battle site in mid-space. All of the other forces are already fighting each other when they arrive. Reyoko is taking great pleasure in blasting them all, one by one. Tenchi is floating behind Reyoko wearing a space suit, tied up. Dr. J is nowhere to be seen.)
Heero: Where's Dr. J?!
Trowa: Did it ever occur to you that he could have been lying?
Heero: Thank you, Trowa, for pointing that out, TWO HOURS TOO LATE!!!!
(Just then, Aeka makes an announcement)
Aeka: Listen to me! Nobody's going to get the reward at this rate! We all have to work together and destroy her! After she's dead and Tenchi is safe, you can all kill each other over the reward for all I care. Now, everyone prepare to launch your strongest attack. Fire it on my order.
Ryo: ...shall we?
Heero: Why not? The universe is going to collapse any minute now anyway.
(Everybody charges up their most powerful attack/weapon. Ryo dons the armor of Inferno with assistance from the nearby Ronins, who followed him in another ship. After ten minutes of powering up, Aeka gives the order to fire. However, Reyoko has also been powering up an attack. Everyone's attacks blend to form one huge force. Reyoko matches its power with a beam)
Ryo: How can that be!? Everyone in the universe is blasting her at once, and she's matching the power!!!
Heero: (firing his buster rifle) She got her wish, and then some.
(About eight seconds after the beams clash, the universe implodes from the sudden concentration of energy. The gang is flung to another dimension. They appear in a deserted city alley)
Heero: I'm getting very tired of this.
(A screen appears with Dr. J on it)
Dr. J: You guys are going to have to do a lot better than that if you want to catch me!
Heero: Oh, shut up.
(Heero hurls nearby brick at the screen. It breaks, revealing a room with Dr. J inside)
Dr. J: Uh oh.
(Trowa and Ryo look confused, but Heero wastes no time. He jumps through the screen, and beats Dr. J to a bloody pulp)
Ryo: Heero! We need him to get back!
Heero: I don't care.
(As Dr. J is reduced to a sack of broken bones, the universe fades away, and everyone is returned to the real world in Tenchi's living room)
Ryo: We did it!
Heero: We?
Tenchi: I'm glad that's over. Washuu, never build that awful machine again!
Washuu: I'm not making any promises.
(Dr. J walks through the door)
Dr. J: Hi Heero!
(Dr. J is shot)
Ryo: Heero!
(Dr. J walks in)
Dr. J: Hey, you shot my robot!
(Dr. J is shot. Dr. J enters)
Dr. J: Hey! You shot my robot's maintenance robot!
(Dr. J is shot)
Ryo: Stop it! You'll hit the real one eventually!
Heero: That's the general idea.
(Dr. J walks in)
Dr. J: Hey, you shot my walking, talking blender that looks like me!
(Ryo and Trowa restrain Heero)
Trowa: We need him to finish our gundams!
Heero: I don't care! Let me at him!
(They eventually calm Heero down and confiscate his pistol)
Trowa: Sorry for the trouble we've caused. We'll just go now.
Tenchi: Ok. Goodbye.
Heero: Hold on. What'll we do with Dr. J? We can't take him with us...into public...and we can't just leave him here and expect him to work like he's supposed to.
Washuu: Just leave him here. I'll keep an eye on him!
Trowa: Are you sure you can handle him? He can be very tricky.
Washuu: Don't worry! Everything will be fine! It's under control!
Trowa: Ok. Thanks. I hope he's not too much trouble.
(Gang leaves and starts to walk to the subway)
Trowa: Do you think they'll be ok?
Heero: I don't know. I just hope we don't return to find a smoldering crater where the house is and our ship stolen.
(The gang "borrows" a subway train from a pantless red guy and heads for Tokyo)